Opening my heart for direction

It can be good in our lives to regularly check in and make sure we are on the right path. If everything feels balanced, joyful and relatively easy, you can rest assured you’re probably right where you need to be.

Of course, none of us know our futures for certain and it’s not uncommon to get niggling worries about our future direction. Alternatively we might come to forks in our road and have to make decisions that lead us one way or another. Sometimes the decisions can be made easily, but at other times those decisions can seem extremely difficult.

Decisions regarding my career have been fraught with stress, guilt and anxiety in the past. I have often felt obliged to do more – get a higher position, work overseas, earn a big salary… but none of these things really sing to my heart. The hardest decisions, I believe, were the ones where I didn’t allow myself to see the right choice as an option. I didn’t know it at the time, but I was trying to force a choice between two wrong paths and so the choice could not be made. I spent a lot of time in lost limbo, despairing because I felt I had no answers.

My doctor and psychologist at these times tried to assure me that I knew the answer deep down, but I didn’t believe them at the time. I tried to think long and hard about what I wanted, in fact it was all I thought about day and night, but I came up with nothing but suffering. Now that I look back I believe it was my insistence on thinking about what I wanted too much which caused a sort of emotional paralysis. Instead, I should have stepped away from my mind and observed what I felt I want to do.

This is exactly what I tried a little over a week ago. I’ve recently found myself wondering about my direction next year when my work contract is finished. Instead of letting these demanding thoughts cause anxiety or stress, I decided to take action to address the question now. I did a session of yoga to reconnect my mind with my body and then sat down quietly for a short mediation. I connected with my breath and then opened my heart to hear the direction I would take myself when my work contract finishes later this year. I trusted with every cell in my body that I already knew the answer. With a clear mind I said to myself, “I am open, I am listening. What do I want to do?”

The answer was with me immediately, and I smiled.

I will continue in science, but it is a job and an income for me. The important path for me is continuing my personal growth and the development of my intuition. I know, also, that I want to eventually become some kind of life coach to help people realise their true selves, find joy and live out their biggest dreams. I am moving in the right direction!

I have been quite seriously considering becoming a yoga teacher, because I believe that is a wonderful way for me to connect with people and coach them to express their very best selves. Now that I know this is in the direction my heart is taking me, I am going to solidify those plans. It just feels right!